I won’t lie, I’m a little hungover. I’ve eaten my calorie allowance for the day already, and it’s only 5pm. The only food groups I’ve eaten so far are fat, sugar and carbs and quite frankly, I couldn’t be happier. I mean I’m tired and a little grouchy, but overall, very happy. It’s been a great (the Tories aside) week.
I’ve worked hard this week, as I do most weeks, but I have now recovered from my cold that took longer to get rid of than usual, but it means I’m now back at the gym properly, my energy is back, and I’m making better food choices. Oh, erm, apart from this weekend. But if having KFC for Sunday lunch is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.
Here’s how my week went.
It started out with a smear test, which was nice. Actually, it wasn’t of course, but very important nonetheless, and without meaning to sound like your Mum, please go and have one if you’re not up to date. It doesn’t hurt, yes it’s a little awkward, but deep breathing and daydreaming about Michael Fassbender will get you through it, trust me.
Politics has been the overriding theme of everyone’s week hasn’t it, and as much as some of my friends want to bury their heads in the sand and just pretend it’s not happening because well, politics “is all a bit boring really”, I’m glad more people are talking about something that does, and will, affect us all so deeply. I took Dexter (13) along with me to vote as he’ll be eligible to vote himself next time, and I wanted him to start thinking about the bigger picture in life, not just his Xbox and when his next meal will be (#TeenagerLife). Will he have to pay to go to University? Will the little benefits I get as a lone parent be cut even further? Will our local hospital suffer? And I can’t answer him still because the government is such an utter shambles (I mean DUP … COME ON!) So I would imagine, if you’re anything like me, you’re feeling a lot of anxiety at the moment. And I wish I had an answer for you, but I don’t I’m afraid. I guess I just have to trust that we’ll all be OK, because the alternative is unbearable. I’m trying to find pleasure in the things I do have control over, like spending time with loved ones and looking after my body, but I’ve toyed with emigrating for years, but never (and still don’t) have the funds to do it, but bloody hell that’s an attractive option right now. It has been hard to see some friends and family vote so very differently from me, but y’know, democracy and all that, I just hope that they don’t live to regret that decision.
Wednesday was Pilates in the morning, and Zumba in the evening, and my weird period (that I shouldn’t be having) started, which is SO annoying. The nurse said on Monday that she’ll see what the results of the smear are and if it’s all clear, I’ll have to go into hospital to have a scan to see if they can find out what’s wrong. Oh, AND, I finally got a date through to have an operation on my dodgy eye. It’s a little droopy, and affects my vision, so they’re going to just … pin it up a bit (technical term.) Can you imagine if that goes wrong and I end up with one wide-open, gaping, starey eye? *Shudder* That’s on 4th July, and I’ll be relieved to get that out of the way.
(Classic post-Zumba face.)
Thursday, Friday and Saturday, I went to the gym and worked really hard. Legs one day, upper body the next, and then cardio on Saturday. I do stomach exercises each time I go to the gym because I really dislike my stomach and I can see that there is finally some definition there. I mean it’s all relative because it’s covered in fat, but the fat is firming up, if you know what I mean. This time next year, I will have the body of an Olympic athlete, just you wait and see!
I went bra shopping this week too – buying stuff to take my mind of boys, periods, parenting and Theresa May. It worked temporarily, and although I didn’t get measured, I’ve gone down a bra size in the back, but have upped the cup size, so I’m a 36H now. Treated myself to a pretty blue bra from M&S and have ordered the matching knickers. I was feeling really low about how my body was looking last week and although I still feel like that to some extent, there’s a lot to be said for good underwear! I haven’t treated myself to nice underwear for a long time, but I wore the new bra yesterday and felt really good in it. I also bought this kimono-style jacket and black, denim shorts from Dorothy Perkins. And now can’t afford to buy anything new until 2034. Oh, and when I wore it on my date on Saturday, I was met with, “Oh, are we off to the beach?” Say that again mate, and I’m not going anywhere with you! *sigh*
(Boob alert! I bought the one on the left in a slightly different size.)
Food wise, I’ve been a little up and down … bet you’re getting bored of me saying that, I know I am, but that’s life I’m afraid. I wish I was someone that could say, “Oh yeah, I just ate salad, no dressing, and I’m trying to stick to mainly meat and veg (so to speak), but halloumi has been calling my name all week and I think I ate it 4 out of 7 days. I’d say it’s about 100 calories per slice, but it’s the only dairy I eat, so I’m just going to say that I’m doing my bit to fight osteoporosis (that I don’t have.)
(I didn’t eat the fat on the steaks, the meal top right was Date Night, that’s salmon at the bottom with pesto pasta and rocket.)
I think you’ve probably got a feel now for how my weeks tend to pan out. Fairly active, cycling instead of driving, eating as well as I can but I listen to my body and when I want a ‘treat’, I have one … and then weekends are around 3,000 calories. But I do think I’ve found a good balance, and something that works for me. I mean if I put weight on or never lost any, I would, of course, have to think again. But I lost 2lbs this week! And I’m back down to the lowest I’ve ever been with a total weight loss of 4 stones and 3lbs – I was last this week at the end of April.
I know I could make life easier for myself by not eating all the cheese. Or by sipping on a Diet Coke when I see my man-friend, but life is too short, and I’m doing the best I can. And here’s what I think the key is … from my experience. I spent a long time in a miserable, abusive relationship, and I am making damn sure that I make up for lost time. I’m not getting any younger, my kids are getting older, and I feel I gave one decade of my life to one man, and another decade to another man, and my forties are about doing what is best FOR ME. (I mean it goes without saying that my children come first and foremost.) But I generally refuse to do things if I don’t enjoy them. I only work with clients I like. I only go to places that excite me. I only eat food that nourishes my body or, in the case of Star Bars at the moment, my soul. There is a lot to be said for happiness, especially when you’ve lived without it for so long. For example, my relationship with my man-friend isn’t perfect, for reasons I don’t want to go into, but he makes me happy, and as long as that happens, I’m going for it. And whilst I’m enjoying weight-training, I’m going to carry on. I’m not going to let anyone, or anything, get in my way of me getting what I want.
Phew. So that was a long one, but I do really enjoy writing about my week, it’s always nice to look back on and see how far I’ve come, how my mood was, what types of things I was enjoying etc. so thank you for allowing me to do that each week. I think I’m going to go camping again next week as Blacks have given me some more equipment, but here’s what happened last time if you wanted to catch up.
Over and out for now – please do follow me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, and I’ll see you next week, and if you’re interested in learning more about the Thinking Slimmer download I listen to every night, you can find more information HERE.