It feels like I’ve been on a diet for 40-odd years, but it’s only in the last 11 months that something has clicked and it’s working. For those of you who read my weekly Slimming World updates, you’ll know that it hasn’t been easy, AND … I still have a long way to go. Having said that, I’m doing OK, I’ve lost over 3 stones and as I’ve lost weight I’ve noticed a few things. So I thought I’d share some of them with you – do let me know if you can relate!
1. I DON’T FEEL INVISIBLE ANYMORE
Or rather, I feel less invisible. After all, I’m still an overweight middle-aged woman and unfortunately, society as a whole tends to ignore people like me. But when I was bigger, I was literally invisible, to the point where I would barely go out, and when I did, I felt like I didn’t really have the right to be sharing the same air as anyone else. I mean, after all, I’m just a fat person. When I was more overweight, my self-esteem was pretty low, and that’s what I projected. So I think I was probably walking around with my head hung low because I just felt so bloody shit about myself, and so it’s no wonder no-one paid me any attention.
Nowadays, even with 5 stone or so still to lose, I feel so much better about myself that I even walk around Tescos like a BOSS. My confidence has rocketed, my head is high again and I now remember that I deserve to be here as much as anyone else. It’s definitely a psychological thing, and taking care of myself has helped me like myself again.
2. PLANE SEATBELTS
Plane seatbelts fit me comfortably! I never needed a belt extender, but had I carried on the path I was on, it was only a matter of time. Now I know that no matter what airline I fly with, the belt will fit.
3. I DON’T ROLL OFF MASSAGE BEDS
I treated myself to a long overdue massage yesterday (btw, the bed was HEATED – I know!) and although I have never actually fallen off a massage bed before, as funny as that would have been at the time, they were always slightly uncomfortable, insofar as my arms would overhang if I didn’t tuck my hands under my legs to keep me secure. This time, there was plenty of room either side, although I do still struggle to manage ‘the girls’ when it comes to turning over mid-way. I still haven’t mastered that grab, tuck and roll thing.
4. CAR SEATBELTS DON’T GARROTTE ME
Seatbelts seem to be a bit of a theme! But being blessed/cursed with big boobs all my life has meant that seatbelts have always been a bone of contention. Especially when they NEAR STRANGLE ME every time I get in the car. Slight exaggeration, but losing weight has meant the belt sits a lot flatter and doesn’t garrotte me anymore. Which is nice.
5. EXCESS SKIN
Like I’ve said, I still have a long way to go, but there’s no denying (and I know I’ve mentioned it before), but there’s going to be an excess skin issue sooner rather than later. Certain body parts aren’t so … full anymore. We’re talking boobs, thighs, upper arms and stomach, and as much as I’m doing my best to counter this with exercise, age, gravity and less flesh will all mean that things just won’t look 100% how I want them to. Still, I should live another five years extra, so every cloud!
Seriously, it’s a price to pay isn’t it for losing so much weight. Would I have surgery if I could afford it? Hell yes. Would I still be happy if I don’t have surgery? Hell yes. I’m just going to have to deal with whatever I have, and however I look along the way, and remain as positive as I can. Life isn’t perfect, and nor are bodies, so it’s up to me to just get strong and healthy, and wear good underwear!
6. BAGGY KNICKERS
I don’t know why I just don’t go out and buy new knickers already, but Christ on a bike, my knickers are so baggy! To the point where I have to hitch them up by my waist, then put my tight gym leggings on so that they’ll keep my knickers in place! I should just wear a belt around my knickers and be done with it. (Erm, or buy new knickers.)
It’s amazing how you take the smallest things for granted when you’re smaller, and being able to stop in the street, bend down and tie up my shoelaces without getting out of breath is one of them. I used to have sit down on a chair to do them or, and this is awful, get my son to do them for me. God, that’s so embarrassing to admit, but there you have it.
8. ALL THE ENERGY
I have so much more energy than before. I was in a vicious circle of eating crap, which didn’t fuel my body at all, so I didn’t have the energy to exercise or get off the sofa, so I ate more, and got bigger. And so on. Now I eat to fuel my body for exercise (although I’m still partial to the occasional Terrys Chocolate Orange – DAMN YOU TESCOS and your £1 special offer!), my body has more energy, so I feel the need to burn it off at the gym. I go to bed later, because I’m always busy doing something, the house is tidier (mind you, I did hire a cleaner, but I tidy before she comes!) and my life just seems to be running a lot smoother.
9. NEW CHALLENGES
Opening yourself up to new challenges is all part of the gaining of self-confidence I mentioned in no.1, and you’ll start to realise that you’re more capable of things than you thought. I haven’t done anything like a Tough Mudder, but the thought of it isn’t as scary as it once was, and each week when I do my Zumba and Spin classes, I push myself harder and harder each time. I’m keeping up with men and women who are thinner and younger than me, and I am really proud of myself. I can do more each week, I never give up and, because I have my eyes on the prize (a fitter and healthier me for life), I’m uber motivated. It makes me feel like nothing is impossible – which is a pretty awesome feeling to have.
I’d imagine I’ll be able to add to this list as I continue to lose weight, and it’s exciting to think about what other things I’ll be noticing soon! Let me know what you’ve noticed on your weight loss journey.