This weekend has been the most expensive weekend I’ve had this year. If you’re thinking bottles of Moet and a private jet to Paris, you will be sadly very disappointed. As I mentioned earlier this week, I am moving house tomorrow. As in I am actually leaving Dad’s and moving house. Everything is going ahead. There are no hitches and I haven’t been let down. I’m feeling really positive, if a little tired, and am very excited about tomorrow.
The trouble with starting again is that I’ve had to start from scratch. My previous rented house was semi-furnished and so I didn’t need to buy anything a year ago. This time round however, I’ve had to buy everything. We’re talking ALL the bedroom furniture, for both my room and Dexter’s, I’ve bought two sets of three door wardrobes, two sets of four drawers, a washing machine and fridge/freezer.
I daren’t add up how much I’ve spent. I’m not sure what the alternative would have been mind you, had I not made these purchases this weekend. I don’t want to bother Dad any more by coming around to use his washing machine and I am tired of all of my clothes just getting crumpled on the floor. I want my own space again. I want to be able to hang clothes up, know where everything is, have a desk to work on … and I want the same for Dexter too so that he can begin to feel settled and organized again. My plan is that this will encourage him to keep his bedroom tidy, but we’ll see about that one!
The thing is, I never thought I would be in this position at my age. I took out a mortgage when I was 19, a pension at 20 and my plan was to be mortgage free when I was in my 40’s, but Life has a funny habit of throwing you curve balls and one thing I’ve learnt is that it’s how you deal with them that shows true strength of character. I had to sell the house I had owned for 23 years to prevent it from being repossessed after my relationship with Dexter’s dad broke down and as sad as I was, I think it was the making of me. When you think you know what the next five years has in store for you … BAM … the rug is pulled from underneath you.
But you know what? That’s OK. It doesn’t always have to be a bad thing … change I mean. I think we, as women, often underestimate just how strong we really are and it’s only when we find ourselves in a testing circumstances (like the ones I’ve found myself in over the years) that you find out who you truly are.
At the risk of sounding like a bit of a hippy, I have rediscovered who I truly am in the last four years since becoming single, and as much as I have the occasional moan on Facebook about finding things tough (which I did today), I have discovered that I am resilient, more hard-working than I ever thought I could be and capable of amazing things.
So tomorrow is a case of onwards and upwards. I will grit my teeth, knuckle down and get the move done. It’s just another day where I only need rely on myself, but at least I know where I stand that way. I’m hoping that when all of my new furniture and white goods arrive in a week or so, I can start to ‘nest’ again and hopefully this house will be a much longer term opportunity for us all.
So think of me at 10.30am tomorrow when I will be meeting my landlady at my new house so she can handover the key. If I have time, I’ll bore you all with photos of unpacked boxes and my sweaty face. No need to thank me. And in the meantime, I’ll just put my feet up and watch the Wimbledon final … until all the madness starts tomorrow.
Send gin. STAT.