I’ve tried to write a blog post for weeks now. No big announcement or anything, but just to write something. Anything. But every time I try, the words haven’t quite made it from my head through to my fingers. I have procrastinated like mad – suffice to say, I ended up taking a random typing test the other day (92 wpm if you’re interested) just because I couldn’t quite form a coherent blog post. Also, half term is never conducive to blogging. Put it this way, as I write this, I’m sitting on my bed with Dexter crawling under my legs, using them as a cave. A leg cave if you will.
Not being able to write isn’t like me at all as it’s not like writing is a hardship … I love writing, but I’ve taken a couple of knocks recently that I think have affected me and dented my confidence a little. The first was losing the house (I wrote about that here.) I know these things happen, and it would have been so, so much worse if I had been buying instead of renting, but I had been really relying on having that house to go to to make a home for us all.
And then I didn’t make the final 5 of the Brilliance in Blogging Awards. Again. And I know it’s not a big deal, but it does always feel like ‘always the bridesmaid, never the bride.’ Mind you, I was a bride once and look how that turned out.
I also got a few comments about my weight after I wrote about how difficult it was to shop for clothes if you were big busted. I put them in the trash, where they belonged, but you know, people can be horrid. I’m a strong person, but I’m not infallible.
I felt like I wanted to have SOMETHING IMPORTANT to say before I published another blog post and asked my blog FB page if there was anything in particularly that they wanted me to write about. The response I got was quite surprising (at least to me.) They said that it didn’t really matter what I wrote, they enjoyed my blog because of how I wrote. Blimey. So there I was, worrying way too much about what to say when actually, people just like me chattering away about nothing in particular, they just happened to like a little insight into my world and my occasional, mildly amusing repartee.
I sometimes feel like, as a blogger, I’m suffocating in a sea of other bloggers and I question where I fit. Everywhere I look, new blogs are popping up and, don’t get me wrong, it’s great to see the community grow, but it’s moved on so much I don’t know where my place is anymore. The blogging community, in its current form, is nothing like the one I was a part of at the beginning – that’s life etc, but I think there are a few of us ‘old skool’ bloggers who are maybe questioning their blogs, just like I am.
Twitter is becoming a dumping ground for bloggers to dump links to their blog posts or to linkys – oh God, ALL the linkys – and it’s harder, although not impossible, to just converse with like-minded people. I also worry about saying something untoward on the blog that might get misinterpreted and a mass debate (snigger) will start that I really can’t be bothered to get involved in.
My blog isn’t perfectly styled because quite frankly, I just don’t really have the time to spend hours on a photoshoot, or have a partner that can help. I’m happy with the way it looks, but more importantly, I’m happy with the content. So often I see new bloggers question how to make money from blogging, how can they become popular, how can they get noticed … and I feel like their Mum when I say the same thing over and over again – just produce good content and people will come. It’s a lesson I need to remember myself I guess.
I am well aware I’m rambling the shit out of this blog post but I think I just needed to clear out the cobwebs and get all of this off my considerably sized chest before I can start to blog again properly.
Blogger’s block – anyone else suffer?