This morning I woke up looking like this.  Attractive no?  (No.)  As much as I love a selfie where I’m looking relatively good, I’m not averse to showing my readers when I look awful and lets face it, this is not a good look.

 

I don’t know how I did it either, which is annoying.  I had a minor procedure at the Dr’s yesterday, spent all afternoon in bed and woke up looking like this.  Of course, I immediately took to social media for a full ‘medical’ diagnosis.  Opinions ranged:

 

“Get your blood pressure checked.”

“Ow ow ow.”

“Looks like it could be conjuncitivis.”

“Cum in the eye again?”

 

All (some) very helpful.

 

I remember Mum getting these burst blood vessels for no reason (she died aged 60) … so now I was in a complete panic.  Thought this was a sure sign I was going to die by the time Jeremy Kyle started.

 

I proceeded to Google the shit out of ‘burst eye blood vessels’ only to find that actually, it’s quite common and probably nothing to worry about.  Which isn’t very exciting at all really.  Seems it’s just another sign of getting old … together with the chin hairs and inability to hold my wee for very long.

 

This growing old gracefully malarkey is harder than you think.  What are the signs that YOU’RE getting old?

 

 

 

 

 

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Published by Kate Sutton

Writer, Mother, Dater.

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11 Comments

  1. Where do I start?
    So many things, forgetting things I know that I know. Like passwords, people’s name and much more.
    Middle Aged spread – despite dieting and exercising.
    When all your children are taller than you.
    Everyone in authority is younger than you.
    When your children ask you if you are OK for money.
    It is not fun.

  2. All of the below are sad but true facts that apply to me.

    I make a noise when I get up from the sofa or any comfy chair

    I have to hold anything that needs reading at stretched arms length and literally anyone’s glasses are better than no glasses.

    My joints make funny noises, alot, squelching and clicking.

    And the general aches and pains..oh my, I could go on but I am depressing myself xxx

  3. Ah yes, the chin hair. Also squatting down and not being able to get up again without a younger person’s help. Someone offering you a seat on the tube. Clicky hips. A love of your bed and a growing aversion to loud noise. A realisation that all is not well with the world. A sudden wish to do everything, but no energy to do it. 🙂

  4. Hope it didn’t hurt. You look 21 to me darling and yep really common (never google for medical diagnosis, scares the shit out of me)..although once my GP did tell me to google rather than come in to see him (erm I can get a little neurotic when it comes to health)! Cum in the eye-bahah!

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