It has been pointed out to me that I have been extremely tardy in the writing up of my dating blog posts. It’s almost as if I have a life or something!
So many apologies (Jean) and I thought I would give you all a brief update on what’s been going on. Primarily before I forget, because that is highly likely at my age.
I think the last thing I mentioned was probably that I was dating three different men. I stupidly named them 1, 2 and 3, and understandably got completely confused with who was who.
A brief recap:
Number one: The Old Flame a.k.a. the man up north.
Number two: The Hippy That Believed In Aliens.
Number three: The new one on the scene who I haven’t really mentioned. But he’s a jolly nice chap.
So I think we were up to two dates with Old Flame. He came down a couple of weeks ago on Sunday morning and we met in my local cafe for a Sunday fry up. Except he just had a black coffee whilst I looked like a greedy bastard having double sausage (ooer.) I also had Dexter with me so it is the second time the boys had met so I was slightly nervous about that.
We had a lovely day together. He brought down a bottle of Prosecco for me and we sat outside in the garden and drank it along with my best friend who just ‘happened’ to turn up.
I had arranged for a babysitter for that evening and so we got ready and went out for a drink. Now because we had had Dexter around with us all day, my date had been the perfect gentleman, but now we were on our own I had hoped things would relax a little. Alas, there was no hanky-panky under the Beefeater table and I think he only kissed me once all day.
And if I’m honest I think I’ve actually got bored talking about this date which I think … gives me a slight indication that maybe all is not well.
We got a Chinese takeaway and brought it back to mine to eat. We had a very pleasant evening but here is the thing. I want more than just ‘pleasant’ and ‘nice’ and, between you and me, I think I deserve it. The trouble with this guy? I think he presumes that because we dated before all those years ago, he’s already ‘got’ me. He seems to have fallen into that easiness, that ‘I don’t have to try too hard,’ that ‘she is mine’ feeling already.
I want to be wooed! I want to feel like I am the first thing he thinks of in the morning and the last thing he thinks of at night. I want to feel special. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for (although apparently it is.)
The thing is, when you get to my age, you know what you want and you know what you don’t want. You would think that would make dating easy. It doesn’t. I find that I’m having to sort the wheat from the chaff a whole lot more these days because I’m just not prepared to waste my valuable spare time on someone that doesn’t deserve it. I think when you’re younger you feel like you have all the time in the world and so you’re more willing to try things out … to see how they fit.
I think I need to do a Ross from Friends ‘pros and cons’ type list because this guy has a lot to offer, but I think if he was The One … I would know. Deep in the pit of my belly ‘know.’ But maybe that part of me is now broken and I won’t ever feel like that about someone again. Christ what a depressing thought. Moving on …
He stayed the night, which, by the way is always good, and he left in the morning with a peck on the cheek. Since then radio contact has been limited because he lives a long way away. He’s a busy man and if I’m honest I think he’s probably just as scared as I am. The trouble is, I feel like I need to get to know this guy from the beginning again because the last time we were together (because of circumstances) it wasn’t like a normal relationship and so I feel like I’m struggling to get to know this guy properly.
I don’t think I’m being needy but I need more. Ha! And I’ve told him is such twice and yet … I just can’t seem to get to where I want with him.
It always seems like such hard work.
Kind of feel like it’s a shape up or ship out meeting.
Since beginning this blog post he has, however, visited me again so I have a further update for you!
I think all of the above was the reason that I then decided to date someone else. And that’s a whole other story.