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It’s 8.50pm on a Tuesday night and I’m sat on my sofa in a leopard print, sleeveless blouse, no trousers, freshly painted nails and freshly curled hair.  I’ve deliberately sat on my red sofa, instead of my leopard print sofa, in case I vanish completely.


Normally, I’d be in bed by now, catching up on emails and The Following.  It’s Tuesday after all.  No one goes out on a Tuesday.  Except tonight … I was meant to be going on a date.


And I’ve been stood up it seems.


Now I’m not the first person to be stood up, won’t be the last and it’s not the end of the world.  BUT …. WTAF?  Since when is it ok to do that to someone?


And I’ll tell you the sad thing?  As a forty-something woman attempting to date in this day and age … I’m not even angry.  I’m mildly pissed off.  Apathetic at best.  But I half expected it.


I haven’t had a date for about six weeks.  A combination of working too hard and just being ever-so disappointed in the men I’ve met lately has meant that it really is quite an ask to shave my legs mid-week.  So I just haven’t bothered – with men I mean.  I have shaved (occasionally.)


And then I met Nick.  I’ll use his real name because I have no desire to protect his anonymity.  We met online about a week ago.  Banter was pretty good.  He had a good sense of humour and didn’t take himself too seriously.  I thought I’d cut to the chase and, as many modern women do these days (well this one does,) I asked if he’d like to go on a date with me.  He replied, “I would LOVE to go on a date with you.”


We had a fairly long conversation on the phone.  Swapped a couple of photos each.  Swapped a couple of texts each day, not a great deal if I’m honest because I haven’t even met him yet so wanted to retain some air of mystery.  But the texts were friendly, he was supposedly ‘really looking forward’ to meeting me tonight and we agreed a time and a place.


I booked a babysitter.  I had a bath.  Put a nice outfit on.  Even put a spritz of perfume on.



kate leopard print


And then I got stood up.


And I just don’t understand why anyone would do that?  I would NEVER do that to anyone.  EVER.  I mean, what is the bloody point?  What does someone get from dicking someone else around like that?  Some perverse satisfaction that they’ve had the last laugh?  Some weird power trip?  Are they married and just want to know that they’ve still ‘got it?’


It beats me.  Seriously.  I have absolutely no idea why someone would do that.   Thankfully, I didn’t go to the pub, I just quickly figured out, after my babysitter had arrived I should point out, that because he didn’t return my call or text, he was going to be a no-show.


My best friend summed it up best when I rang her.  “The only excuse I’d accept for a no-show is if he’s been run over by an articulated lorry and he’s lying dead in a gutter.  Other than that, it’s inexcusable.”


And I’d agree.


So, it’s onesie, bag of Revels and bed for me.  Will it put me off trying to find someone nice to date?  My expectations are unfortunately so low now I’m not quite sure where to go from here to be honest.  I’m not angry because a large part of me didn’t expect him to turn up anyway.


How sad is that?


But hey.  What I do know is that when I do finally meet that someone special, they are going to have to be really bloody special because I’m not sure how many more times I’m prepared to put myself on the line.



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Published by Kate Sutton

Writer, Mother, Dater.

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  1. What a creep. No excuses either, especially as he had your mobile number. A simple message would have been better than nothing. You deserve so much better x

  2. I’m really sorry about your shit evening. At the end of the day now, we’re accessible 24/7 – we can be phoned, texted, even emailed or Facebooked or Tweeted to our phone when not at home. There’s no excuse for it. Just bloody rude. I almost hope in a way that he was mown down and wasn’t just a wanker because you don’t deserve it.
    Michelle G recently posted..It’s Meh Monday!My Profile

  3. Its not ok, no one would like it or be ok with so you don’t do it to others. End. Of. Nick is a loser and you are his most recent loss. Tosser! Enjoy the revels and I too am watching The Following (with not recently shaved legs!) xx
    Claire, Cheshire Mum recently posted..ArgoMy Profile

  4. Not on and so dam annoying and rude, bloody rude…however, this ‘may’ make you feel better…
    Years ago I went out with a guy on a date, he’d been pestering me for ages but I didn’t really fancy him. Anyway I agreed to go out with him one night.
    He picked me up and went off the the coast (20 or so miles away) to a club, went inside got a drink he went to the gents…and never came back!!! Just vanished.
    Yes he left me there!
    The club was out of town I had to get a taxi into town get a train to near home as I could (luckily they were still running) then another taxi home.
    Never heard from him again. (all this was pre mobile phone)

    Feel better yet?

    hugs xxxxx

  5. Oh Kate dont be disappointed! Its only the fact that as we get older we think we can predict the future and 9/10 we are right! Try to picture yourself in your leopard print glory as your 15 year old self! How would she deal with, it may change your perspective:) hope so! Look forward to your musings of very real life xx

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