I alluded to something in last week’s Healthy Lifestyle update that was about surrounding yourself with like-minded people. Your tribe if you will. (And I will, thanks!) I think this is especially pertinent when you’re trying to keep fit and/or lose weight because it’s SO important to be as positive as you can, as much as you can. The last thing you need when you’re on … here it comes … your journey, is jealous, sour-faced biatches that don’t have your best interests in heart.
I came to this realisation in my early 40s. For me, it was a time of my life when I suddenly knew who I didn’t want in my life (my ex), and who I did (awesome friends.) I wish I’d understood this when I was younger because it would have saved me a lot of heartache, but I’m glad it came to me eventually. It’s not that I didn’t have friends, but I guess I just wasn’t as selective as I am now.
The whole man thing aside (ie. I haven’t had one for five years), I found myself beginning to … and I don’t want to use the term ‘ghost’, but I guess it’s true … move away from people who were soul-suckers. Those who took up too much of my time, always ignored my (admittedly limited) words of wisdom, who took and never gave and, most importantly of all, didn’t make me feel good about myself. I didn’t, nor do I, need people to big me up every day. I mean it’s bloody great, but I’m a big believer in your power coming from within you and never making it someone else’s job to make you happy. But it’s so much better to be around nice people. It’s really that simple.
And so I started to be more choosey about who I hung out with. Even who I talked to online. My friendship group, small to begin with, became even smaller but at least I knew that the people I shared my valuable time/resources/knowledge/jokes with, totally ‘got’ me. My best friend has always been by my side, and always will be – poor cow hasn’t got much choice, but since I’ve been on my healthy journey, being surrounded by positive people has been a God send. Seriously. I have a lovely community over on my blog Facebook page – over 6,000 of us – and every single person is full of support, admiration, encouragement, positivity and love. Not just for me, but for each other.
That’s what I want for every single one of you – whether it’s friends online or in real life. Life is too short to be surrounded by people who don’t have your best interests at heart. Surround yourself with people who have similar goals to you. Who won’t try and give you that extra slice of cake when you’re trying so hard to say no. They’ll know you’ll save it for the weekend, or you’re not eating sugar so won’t bother, or whatever … they’ll just ‘get’ it.
And if they don’t … it’s a hard lesson to learn, but friendships change over the years and sometimes journeys like the one I’m on show up the cracks in a friendship that perhaps were there all along.
Find your tribe. Kick ass together. Laugh A LOT. Run together. Eat good food together. Whatever it is you love doing … get rid of any negative baggage that’s lurking in the background. Including unsupportive partners, although annoyingly, they’re a lot harder to get rid of – trust me!
And so concludes Kate’s Message Of The Day!