Short Man

Feb 6, 2013 by

 

 

Yesterday was a great result for equality.  I’m all for equal marriages (even though my local MP opposed – shame on him,) but it did cause me to question my own prejudices after I was recently accused of something so heinous, so incredibly offensive and inappropriate, I just had to share it with you.

 

(Mind you, it was all true.  But that’s not the point.)

 

Yesterday, I was told I was heightist.  That’s right.  ME?  HEIGHTIST?!?  Can you believe it?

 

Now that I’m back on the dating scene again, the freaks … they just keep-on-a-comin’.  This week has involved approaches from a man wearing pink trousers, a man wearing two diamante earrings, a man wearing a Sylvester Stallone jumper, (that’s right, Sly’s crinkly old face looking back at me – not THE sexiest thing I could be looking at,) and a man with his kids’ names tattooed all over his hairy, spotty back.

 

Oh how I’ve missed it.

 

But then I spotted someone normal.  Someone who had a nice face.  A beard (win.)  A sultry, ‘come hither’ sparkle in his eyes.  Oh, and he lived local – always a bonus.

 

I viewed his profile and quickly took down his particulars …. but something was missing.  Alarm bells definitely started ringing.  He hadn’t written his height down.

 

*SOUNDS THE SHORT MAN KLAXON*

 

OK, by now I’ve seen a photo of him strolling on the beach, obligatory shot of him lying in bed looking up at his camera – hell, I’ve even seen him posing in front of his cream curtains, just so we can all get the full effect of how good looking he truly (thinks) he is.

 

But let me just point something out.  I’ve been out with guys my height before.  I’ve even been out with guys a little bit shorter.  And that’s fine (just about.)  But when I asked him how tall he was, I didn’t expect him to answer, “5ft 5”.

 

I know.  Bless the little short fella.

 

He took me by surprise.  Not literally (unfortunately.)  I’d looked at his proportions.  Checked out the shin length (really.)  And decided that he had to have been at least my height.

 

Alas, he was, in fact, a midget, and as much as I’d like to say it doesn’t matter … it really, really does.

 

I don’t think I’m an overly shallow person.  Particularly as I’ve gotten older I’m much more interested in meeting someone who is intelligent, funny, (HOT) and interesting.  BUT …. and, just like my derriere, it’s a big BUT … some things I just can’t get on board with and bending down to kiss my man is one of them.

 

I’m sure Verne Troyer is a smashing bloke.  I think Warwick Davies is hilarious.  It’s just not for me.

 

Does anyone have a much shorter boyfriend and think I’m destined to die alone?

 

 

 

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14 Comments

  1. Hi, or should I say high!

    I am a tall lady, total opposite of your charming mini suitor.
    I *was* 6ft2 until pregnant, but Mr bump injured me over a decade ago now, and today I am 6ft. My partner is 5ft11 but I have dated a lady of about 5ft6 or 7. Looks wrong, seems wrong. It’s not heightest… If you are not suited and don’t match he’s not for you!

    Maybe suggest he wears “hidden heels” lol
    Julie

    • Ah, the Cuban Heels debate. Yeah, I’ve suggested that before. Weird they don’t like that idea really – I think it’s genius.

  2. I am quite short, and so have the opposite problem – men are all too tall! Great blog post, made me giggle!

  3. Caroline

    Up until very recently I was very heightest. As a lady that hits 5’11″ in a pair of trainers, I’ve been on the hunt for someone not less than 6′.
    And then I finally met S who I’ve had a crush on via Twitter for quite some time. Having been looking for that sparkle that makes a relationship work, I appear to have found it in a wonderful guy who’s 5’9″. What can I say, if you find the magic with someone and they happen to not be quite what you’d expected, so be it!

    • Well that’s encouraging to hear – but he’s not short at 5ft 9″ … you are just gloriously tall! But you’re right, can’t help that chemistry eh!

  4. 21st century mummy

    Ever since I started going out with guys, they’ve had to be taller than me. I just don’t go for shorter men, in fact they need to be a few inches taller than me as I like wearing heels. My husband at 6’2 is the perfect height as and I’m 5’8. You can’t help the way you feel.

  5. Great post, did make me giggle :) I am about 5ft 7 and and once dated a guy who was about the same height as me – he was lovely, but it did (despite me trying not to let it) bother me a bit. As soon as I put heels on I was taller than him and in photos I found myself sloughing around the waist area to try and shorten myself! I like to feel wrapped up in a man when you hug and with him it always felt a bit like I might be in danger of crushing him or breaking a rib… he was quite a slim build a well as being a little on the short side… So yes, it’s prob wrong to admit it, but when it comes down to it, looks like I am heightiist too!

  6. I have a minimum height requirement in a bloke of 5’10” I know this is heightist – not to mention hypocritical (being 5’0” myself!), but am absolutely resolute in it! Have just remembered the episode in SATC when Carrie sees her short bloke has a jacket in a children’s size! LOL. Can’t really see your replies on this lovely purple….

  7. Late to the party, but having a browse of my fave bloggers today.

    I am 5’6″ (stood tall and proud), my Hubby is 6’2″. I love that I can snuggle into his chest when its cold. I couldn’t do that with someone my size! I did go out with someone the same height as me, but I was 15! And it was weird then! (I only went out with in for my friend, but that’s a WHOLE other story) xx

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  1. 10 Things I Hate About Dating - WitWitWoo - […] are a whole lotta short men out there.  Which is fine.  And I’ve written about the whole ‘short man …

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